Image: "The Sound of Silence", 2009, Beach Scene near Crescent City, Ca - Photographer: Stephen Van Devender
Proverbs 9:8–9 Do not correct a scoffer, lest he hate you; Rebuke a wise man, and he will love you. 9 Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; Teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.
Proverbs 10:9 He who walks with integrity walks securely, But he who perverts his ways will become known.
Proverbs 10:19 In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise.
Proverbs 10:32 The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, But the mouth of the wicked what is perverse.
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"It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt!"
It is the prerogative of age to ruefully review one's previous life. When I do so I have to admit that, more often than I like, the truth of the above epigram proved it self fairly often. Sometimes thoughts in our heads and passions in our heart build up some kind of steam pressure in us and we just have to speak.
I've known people, a fair number of relatives among them, who always have to have the last word in some kind of heated interchange... it stopped being a "sharing of ideas" well before the end and rather became a verbal chess match. It becomes less important to speak intelligently in reply than it is just to say something. It's a common enough pattern to suggest that is part of our fallen man DNA.
Solomon here says: "In the multitude of words sin is not lacking!" We all should wear a T-shirt with that emblazoned on it... backwards so that when we see our reflection we will remind ourselves.
This prompts me to pause and consider just how subtle and ingrained sin patterns really are in our psyche. Take for example Proverbs 8:9 & 10:8. Each of these sayings have to do with listening. "Rebuke a wise man and he will love you!" (8:9) "The wise in heart will receive commands..." (9:8) Now here is the very opposite of "having to have the last word!"
Our, at least speaking for myself... perhaps you're different, first impulse if someone says something we don't like hearing, like "you're wrong in this!" is to become defensive. "Oh yeah! Well, who do you think you are! That jerk deserved to get put into his place and I did it! If you had been there you would have done the same thing!"
When this happens, as it all too often does, it's really no longer we who are speaking... it is pride within us. We hear something like this and instead of quietly considering it to see if there is a measure of truth in it we become combative. Now, it is possible that the speaker is wrong and we really weren't wrong in what we did or said. A moment of quiet reflection might reveal that. But the spontaneous burst of words, even if it later proves to be correct, certainly does mean that sin is not absent. We may not have erred in the original action but you can be pretty sure we erred when we defensively blasted out against the friend who spoke to us.
Proverbs 10:9 talks about "walking with integrity." Certainly this applies to other things than just our ordinary conversation. Integrity is a whole person attribute and is reflected in all our dealings. But thinking about today's subject consider the reputation we gain by lashing out with our tongues. Think of people you know whom you would describe as "prickly." What goes into that characteristic? Is it not a quick, sharp tongue that is swift to go on the offensive in any verbal encounter?
Now consider that attribute of "gentleness." The scriptures certainly list this as being an aspect of "integrity." "Gentleness" cannot coexist with "prickliness." When we are describing an overall personality trait one will be dominant... more readily displayed. Which characteristic does the Lord encourage... or, more strongly, which does He require... in us? It's pretty straight forward.
So what we are exhorted to do is develop a reputation for wisdom in such a manner that our speech, even in a multitude of words, works for edification and not destruction. "The lips of the righteous feed many!" (10:21) That is what we want to develop and it means developing a quiet spirit in our speaking as well as other things. This is the manner in which we become "secure" in our walk (10:9) such that our mouths "bring forth wisdom" and speak "what is acceptable." (10:31,32)
Perhaps a word to the wise might come from our own conscience ... perhaps we ought to listen quietly to what it says.
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